Date: May 30, 2005
Time: 11:48pm
Subject: It Must be Love

*****
What's worse than sitting down for a nice leisurely poo with a good magazine...only to look up and see the world's largest roach skittering across the bathtub towards you?

Having to be the hero and coming in right after someone else has pooped to kill said giant roach.

Thanks, honey...I love you! My own personal Man in Black!

I know...I know...two poop entries in as many days. I'll try to stop that. But at least we know I'm regular! hahahahahaha

jlm, 5.30.05, 11:53pm
 |
Date: May 30, 2005
Time: 1:40pm
Subject: Starved? I think not!
*****
If I keep posting pictures like this, people are going to:
a) Realize what stupid stuff we eat
b) Think I starve my cat and that he's forced to forage for himself
c) Notice how messy our pantry is (guess what's on the to-do list for this weekend)

But he's just so cute I can't help myself!!

jlm, 5.30.05, 1:43pm
|
Date: May 29, 2005
Time: 11:51pm
Subject: Plunge Softly When Making a Big S**t
*****
Let's layer on the embarrassing situations, shall we?
  • Have to poo while mother-in-law is at your house for lunch
  • Realize that your toilet has once again clogged
  • Realize there's no such thing as a quiet plunger
  • Decide that you haven't been very stealthy after all, and decide to announce "I broke it...but then I fixed it" and move on with your life

    Anyway, that's me. That's my life. A series of embarassing poops. In other news, the aerobics instructor is having a party. Some shirtless guy keeps running in and out of the apartment, and there's been some loud conversations outside. There's also an empty beer bottle on the steps. If it's still there tomorrow I'm calling the rental office. Maybe I'll wait until they are with prospective renters and then go in and raise Hell about how this place is turning into a slum. I love that trick.

    Well, good night.

    jlm, 5.30.05, 12:01am
     |
    Date: May 29, 2005
    Time: 11:27am
    Subject: The Neighbors
    *****
    I never really appreciated the value of having an empty apartment next door. Since we've lived here, the apartment next to ours has been empty, occupied, evicted, and now lived-in again. Actually, at one point we're pretty sure we were the only people on this floor. Now we have the people across the hall from us who routinely leave their garbage outside their door for days at a time. (in all fairness, as I write this, there's a garbage bag with dirty kitty litter sitting outside my front door...but it'll be gone in a little while when we leave for work)

    Of course, I'd take 15 of the people across from us if we could get rid of the people next door. It's a woman and her son...we think. She is either an aerobics instructor or a hooker - she's always running around in spandex shorts. She likes to play music loud. By the bass line, it all sounds like the same song, but I could be wrong. She keeps her windows open, which I respect. No chance I'd be living with natural air with the temperature in the 90's! Unfortunately, with the windows open all the time, her door is prone to slamming...and she seems to forget that. SLAM SLAM SLAM - more than anyone should need to go in or out of their apartment. Since the windows are always open, she burns citronella tiki torches out on her balcony. We're wondering when the place is going to burn down. She also has a bike that sometimes lives on our hallway. And I can't blame this on her, but about a week after she moved in, there was a used condom on the landing between our floor and the floor below. And the general level of dirtiness around our building has gone way up in the past month or so.

    I guess this all goes to show: You can pick your friends. You can pick your nose. But you can't pick your family or your neighbors.

    jlm, 5.29.05, 11:39pm
     |
    Date: May 28, 2005
    Time: 11:42am
    Subject: Saturday Six
    *****
    This week's questions were tough for me. Bible verses? Song lyrics? puh-lease!

    1. What is the most inexpensive, non-valuable thing you tend to collect and hoard? Why do you do it? McDonald's Happy Meal toys. I really only save the Disney ones. Why do I do it? I love toys...especially ones you get for free when you buy a cheeseburger, fries, and orange drink!

    2. What is the highest price you've paid per gallon for gasoline where you live? Do you use regular, mid-grade or premium? Well, it would've been in the last month or two...I think $2.19...for regular. I've had that car for less than 4 years and I've seen gas prices more than double in that period. How sad!

    3. What is your favorite Bible verse and why? If you don't have a verse from the Bible that holds meaning to you, what's your favorite saying and why? I've got to go with a saying here: "You may be only one person in the world, but you may also be the world to one person." Why? Because I said so!

    4. What was your favorite movie from the 1970s? When did you last view it? Do you have it in your movie collection? Star Wars episode IV. I saw it at work last weekend...without sound. Don't own it...but Scott wants to own the whole sextology (hee hee...I said sex) some day.

    5. Do you weigh more, less, or the same as you did one year ago? Six months ago? Three months ago? I have no idea. Same-ish, within 10 pounds I guess.

    6. What one lyric sums up your:
  • current love life? "It's delightful, it's delicious, it's de-lovely"
  • Your view on life? pass
  • Your past? "regrets...I've had a few..."
  • Your hopes/dreams/fears? "ohhhhh we're halfway there...ohhHHHH livin' on a prayer...take my hand and we'll make it I swear..."

    jlm, 5.28.05, 12:04pm
     |
    Date: May 27, 2005
    Time: 10:16pm
    Subject: Ahh...Satire
    *****
    I loved JibJab's animated musical satires of John Kerry and that other guy back in the fall. It made fun of both candidates equally. I can laugh at my people...almost as much as I laugh at the other guys. That's why I love...
  • The Daily Show - the show is like heroin to my little brain. I watch as John Stewart and his posse of ridiculously talented writers and "correspondents" throw the news into the spin cycle until it comes out funny. Sadly, that show is the only "news" I actually watch on a consistent basis. If only all news programs were that funny. There's a reason I've now read AMERICA (the book) cover-to-cover sitting on the couch at the Virgin Megastore! And some day I too shall own it.
  • JibJab - for its quirky animation and ridiculous characterizations, "This Land" became one of my favorites last year. I watched it tonight and it still made me laugh. While at JibJab tonight, I came across
  • The Drugs I Need - this is a cartoon created to get people to sign some petition for some prescription reform or something. I didn't read it, and I'm not endorsing it. But the cartoon was funny. And finally, tonight I found
  • Mark Fiore, an actual political cartoonist. I actually think I stumbled upon his site before, but didn't pay much attention to it. In addition to the fun elephant-vs-donkey fight on his index page, his take on Newsweek really made me laugh.

    I guess this means I'm better than I was this morning. I s'pose all I really needed was a good cry (check!), a good cry movie (Notting Hill - check!), and some crab rangoons (frozen from the grocery store and not as good as the ones at Stinky Shoe, but what the heck - check!) to make me smile once again in the face of political humor.

    jlm, 5.27.05, 10:45pm
    |
    Date: May 27, 2005
    Time: 3:45pm
    Subject: Crime and Discount Groceries
    *****
    There was a freakin' bank robbery across the street from our apartment complex yesterday. Worse yet, the robber got away. Apparently he escaped into the Wal Mart parking lot. I wonder if any marked bills showed up in last night's till.

    Scott and I drove separately yesterday, since he needed to stop and buy a lint brush (darn those cats!). As I was driving by the bank, I thought "gee...a black armored car? what's going on with Brinks?" And then I noticed that it said Lake County Sheriff on the side. "I guess it's not Brinks!" And there was yellow crime scene tape across the front of the building. I called Scott, who had apparently been too distracted by his lint problem to notice the police activity. I could tell he was bummed to have missed all the fun.

    Anyway, I am officially exhausted. May was the busiest month I've had in forever and I'm having trouble coming down from the activity. And I know it sounds stupid, but all of my TV shows ended within a week of eachother. TOPS is over. No more family visits are planned. And at work we are in the heart of the "I'm canceling my vacation if those gay people are going to be there" season. Thank goodness Scott and I scheduled our vacation to overlap with most of that activity! Of course, after Memorial Day, we'll be getting into the "once in a lifetime" visitors who think that they are escaping into a fairy land, and then come here and realize that NOTHING is perfect, and then they call me to complain. So I took a mental health day today. Mostly because I couldn't stop crying this morning. Of course, with holiday pay on the horizon, this is a one-day-only sabbatical.

    And Scott says we can do whatever I want on our weekend, as long as it involves leaving the apartment. All I want to do is lay on the couch and watch movies. We thought about going to Sea World to use those tickets I got from Joann, but I'm worried about the crowds. Of course, since we wouldn't be going on either of the rollercoasters, what lines would there be? I guess we'll see.

    In other news, I don't think I mentioned Scott's little garden. His basil and spearmint plants (the ones we bought at Publix last year) are totally thriving. He's just replanted them in bigger pots, and has also replanted his aloe. And he's growing me flowers that I picked out - from seeds. So far we have little sprouts sticking out of the dirt. And we're babysitting Jaclyn's mickey mouse topiary. I think its vines have grown since we got it. The boy has such a green thumb it makes me sick (since I kill dirt). And our balcony is starting to remind me of his mother's.

    insert Guns 'n' Roses' song Welcome to the Jungle here

    The spearmint is blocking the bottom of the basil "tree" which is very tall and is even growing flowers now!


    jlm, 5.27.05, 4:23pm
    |
    Date: May 26, 2005
    Time: 10:53am
    Subject: What to say...
    *****
    With a picture this good, it's hard to pick just one caption...
  • Milo hops in the fridge to warm up
  • Chinese restaurant exposed
  • "Please may I have some shredded carrot?"
  • Wow...that's a giant jar of garlic!
  • (singing) One of these things is not like the other...

    Please feel free to add your own.

    note: no cats were harmed in the taking of this picture. he jumped in there while I was trying to get a drink...so I took a picture...and then closed the door again until Scott got up to see what I could possibly be taking pictures of in the fridge. And then we had to lure him out with an ice cube!

    jlm, 5.26.05, 11:00am
    |
    Date: May 25, 2005
    Time: 10:40pm
    Subject: Sigh of Relief
    *****
    Well,     is over. We didn't win. We did, however, make it to the final round. All told, we were either 5th or 6th out of 28 teams. We got there thanks to a selfless act on the part of the MK team (who were 1st place going in, looked unstoppable, and then totally choked on their round) who came to our defense when the judges said we were wrong about something in their park. And thanks to Scott, who was on his phone about 15 seconds after they said our answer was wrong, calling people over there to find out for sure.

    And as great as it would have been to enjoy a free night or two at a hotel...or even get some free movie tickets...what I'm really disappointed about is the way some members of our team handled our loss. Something along the lines of, "it can't possibly be our fault...we were robbed," when really we screwed up. Two of the questions we got wrong were because we didn't use proper nomenclature. We know better than that. And two people on our team demanded that our coaches fight the ruling. It was just silliness. We did well. And I knew a lot of stuff...including the Cirque prices. We didn't draw that question, but the team that did didn't know the answer. As soon as the question was read, Scott and I shared some meaningful eye contact. My eyes said 87 75 59. hahaha

    So here's some pictures from today. The one up at the top is my "participant medallion." You can't call it a medal because it's made of rubber. So I call it my TOPS rubber. Always practice safe product knowledge! Below is our team - Maria, Tommy, me, and Thetis. Also our managers - Bethie and Janet. And Beth and Tommy being stupid before our round started.


    Oh yeah - I forgot to mention the classic Jamie moment of the day: I walked over to Beth and some guy in a button-down shirt whom I've never before laid eyes on. Beth says, "Jamie is on our team." And I smile and look at this complete stranger and say, "and I'm about to throw up!" Beth, without missing a beat, then proceeds to introduce me to Doug, our VP. hahaha

    So that's the end of TOPS. I have to say that as of this moment, if by some awful turn of events I'm still working in the Call Center next spring, I won't play again. Although I didn't mind the studying or the "agony of defeat," I didn't like the excuses or the politics. It was disappointing. But overall I give the experience JJJJ out of JJJJJ. :o)

    jlm, 5.25.05, 11:03pm
    |
    Date: May 24, 2005
    Time: 10:29pm
    Subject: Hives?!?
    *****
    I'm stressed. It's official. I swear - I think I'm breaking out in hives on my neck. This really pisses me off because if I had spent a half-hour a day on this stuff for the past month I'd know it cold. But I didn't. I know a lot though. And it'll be interesting to see how much I actually retain. Cirque adult tickets are 87,75,59; and child tickets are 65,56,44. Once I find a pattern, I can remember. It's finding the pattern that's tricky. We're in the last competing round tomorrow, so at least we'll get to watch all of the other teams screw up first. That'll be comforting.

    I watched the Idol final competition tonight. I'm sad to say that I think Bo is going to win. The AOL member poll has him up 53% to 47%, and they've called the past 3 or 4 weeks. Oh well...I got through     Carrie's voting lines about 10 times. No one can say I didn't care enough about the outcome to vote.

    Well, Scott is watching a loud movie, and I'm getting really itchy, so I'm going to go to bed and dream of numbers...and try not to roll over and go back to sleep when the alarm goes off at 6:45.

    ommmmmm ahhhh ommmmm

    jlm, 5.24.05, 10:44pm
    |
    Date: May 24, 2005
    Time: 2:43pm
    Subject: Mental Health Break
    *****
    I'm taking a break from feeling completely un-smart to bring some pictures I just downloaded from my camera. First, a hiden mickey in the roses...
    And now, the new "magic mirror" on Cinderella Castle, which changes images to show other castles around the world. If only I had cropped them all the same!

    That's Tokyo's Cinderella Castle, Paris's Belle Castle, and California's Sleeping Beauty Castle

    I have about 2 hours left before I have to leave for the call center for our last practice. I *did* learn something new today - the American Heritage Gallery is home to the "Echoes of Africa" exhibition. Two hundred more facts like that and I'll be good to go!

    jlm, 5.24.05, 2:52pm
    |
    Date: May 23, 2005
    Time: 3:28pm
    Subject: No "check" for you!
    *****
    I set out to the Magic Kingdom with one purpose today: to ride it's a small world and take pictures as a favor to my cousin Beth, by way of her kids' librarian or something like that. Alas, the line for small world was over 1/2 hour. I have a strict policy on waiting for that ride: don't do it. Instead Jaclyn and I rode Haunted Mansion, Pirates, TTA, and Carousel of Progress. We had burgers at Pecos Bill's too. And I bought a bottle of orange soda (I'm in an orange soda phase right now) and won a free 1 liter Coke product. Hopefully I won't lose the lid like I usually do.

    So no "check" on the to-do list for me. Oh well...I guess that's not such a big deal. On the agenda for the afternoon: watch movies while studying my TOPS binder. Tomorrow afternoon we're getting together for one last study session. I'm waiting for the nerves to kick in.

    jlm, 5.23.05, 3:34pm
     |
    Date: May 22, 2005
    Time: 11:38am
    Subject: This Feeling Called Hunger
    *****
    Scott just left for the store. We're nearly out of cat food, and we somehow lost a bag of shredded cheese that he needs to make lunch. He's boiling chicken to make that casserole with the broccoli and stove top. mmm. He's also got a pineapple upside down cake in the oven. Needless to say, there's all of these ridiculously good smells in here and they're making me so hungry!

    I finished up the design for my June page last night. I'm actually pretty proud of it. I guess it'll be "revealed" soon. In the meantime, try not to wet yourself in anticipation.

    I don't have to go to work tomorrow. Yay!!!

    jlm, 5.22.05, 11:45am
     |
    Date: May 21, 2005
    Time: 11:50pm
    Subject: Saturday Six
    *****
    Before the "six," I just wanted to point out that my creative juices are flowing most on the 11's. Seriously, check out the times of my last few posts! Anyway...

    1. What is the last product or service you tried just because you saw a commercial that impressed or amused you about the product? Did you like the product or service after you tried it? Well, I do love commercials, but I can't think of any examples. Instead I'd like to point at the giant box of Apple Jacks I just had to have on our last shopping trip...because it came with a lightsaber spoon (which, by the way, is awesome!). And it turns out Apple Jacks are better than icecream as a dessert or late-night snack!

    2. How old is the oldest photograph in your home? Are you in it? The oldest pictures that I personally have are 26 years old. From when I was a baby. We don't even have any baby pictures of Scott...because then they would be the oldest ones!

    3. What is the most supernatural event you have experienced? Did you feel there was a specific reason that it happened to you? I once had a Ouija board tell me I was going to marry Andy Hayes. It didn't happen.

    4. Do you usually consider the glass half-empty or half-full? Half-full. Unless things are going down the tubes or I'm talking to someone who is being negative, in which case I try to stay positive and point out that it's "only half-empty."

    5. What part or parts of your body do you shave regularly? First of all, STOP LAUGHING, SCOTT! My pits...then the bottom 6" of my leg (which could possibly be seen when wearing pants that are too short). I hate shaving!

    6. What day is typically your busiest of the week? What day are you usually the happiest? What day are you usually the saddest? Gee...I guess Fridays have been my busiest because of TOPS. Happiest on Sundays - my two favorite TV shows are on Sunday night. Saddest on Wednesday morning because it means I have to get up and go to work.

    jlm, 5.22.05, 12:03am
     |
    Date: May 21, 2005
    Time: 11:38am
    Subject: Quiz
    *****
    How much could have possibly happened in the past 12 hours to warrant another entry? Nothing at all. But hey - it's my journal and I'll blog if I want to. And since Patrick hasn't yet put up the Saturday Six, I guess I'll just have to share the results of this quiz I found on Janette's site, amidst the string of entries about what in the world makes her mad. (I think, by the way, you need to do a happy entry...talk about Laura Bush or Condi Rice or cute little puppies...) Anyway, the quiz was weird, and I found that I really didn't have much of an opinion on many of the questions. Just the same, here are my results:
    You scored as Cultural Creative. Cultural Creatives are probably the newest group to enter this realm. You are a modern thinker who tends to shy away from organized religion but still feels as if there is something greater than ourselves. You are very spiritual, even if you are not religious. Life has a meaning outside of the rational.

    Cultural Creative

    		75%

    Existentialist

    		63%

    Postmodernist

    		63%

    Modernist

    		50%

    Idealist

    		44%

    Romanticist

    		38%

    Fundamentalist

    		31%

    Materialist

    		25%

    What is Your World View? (corrected...again)
    created with QuizFarm.com

    Sounds like me. Actually, a lot like me. I guess I'm cultural creative. Who knew?

    jlm, 5.21.05, 11:46am
    |
    Date: May 20, 2005
    Time: 11:10pm
    Subject: pin (!)
    *****

    I finally got it! And I'm so excited about it that I posted that horrible blurry picture. (One of these days I'm going to invest in a camera with a manual focus so that I know exactly what my picture is going to look like before I click the button.) I also got a visit from one of the Ambassadors, who brought me a really pretty certificate and a special ambassador program pin (which is probably extremely Ebay-able and will some day net my grandchildren tens of dollars), and I got a balloon. And yes Mom, it did used to be Donald. They changed to Pluto about a year ago.

    The rest of the day was pretty good too. We found out that our TOPS team is tied for 2nd place (out of 26 teams) after the assessment round. MK is in 1st, and we're tied with DVC Member Services. We're getting together Tuesday early evening to study together one last time before the competition on Wednesday. I'm really getting excited...and yet terrified at the same time. Somehow knowing all of the ticket prices, including annual/seasonal passes, fell on my lap after I let it be known that I already had the regular park ticket prices memorized. OK, maybe I'm good with numbers, but this has literally tripled the numbers I'm supposed to be good with!

    And now, I can stop harping about my beautiful 5-year pin and start looking forward to the breakfast, which is in July!

    And by the way, the settlement on Mom's house was yesterday. She's now a home owner. My little baby...all grown up and habitating...*sniffle*

    jlm, 5.20.05, 11:24pm
    |
    Date: May 20, 2005
    Time: 11:22am
    Subject: pin (?)
    *****
    Beth asked me yesterday when my company anniversary was. I replied, "last saturday. when I getting my pin?" She said this Friday. Well, that's today. So I blow-dried my hair. If I don't get it today, I'm coming to work in pajamas with my hair in pigtails for the rest of the week.

    On the bright side, I have a short week this week. Because TOPS is on Weds, they changed my days off to Mon/Tues. There's going to be a lot of studying going on...but on Wednesday at 6pm I'm going to forget everything I've memorized. How liberating!

    And Kendra became the third Apprentice last night. She got a Pontiac Solstice. That's one sexy car! This week will also be the season finales of Desperate Housewives and Gray's Anatomy on ABC on Sunday, and Idol's finale is on Wednesday. And then I'll start reading books again. What a novel concept! (and for the record, that lame pun was completely accidental!)

    jlm, 5.20.05, 11:27am
    |
    Date: May 19, 2005
    Time: 12:26pm
    Subject: Freaks & Geeks
    *****
    We should've kept a tally of jedi robes, light sabers, laptop computers, Leia buns, and other assorted weirdness. I also regret the decision I made to not bring my camera. I thought that this was a really big deal to the SW fans, and the least I could do was be a silent observer. Of course, when we walked in the door of the AMC and there were people waiting to have their pictures taken with people in costume, I laughed until I cried. We realized later that some of the people in the lobby had been paid to be there - much like the C3PO in the glass case. The     Sentinel took some pictures at the AMC earlier in the day that pretty accurately represent my time at the theater.

    As for the actual movie, I really liked it. In my opinion, this one was definitely better than Phantom Menace or Clone Wars. It made me really sad though. "hey - let's take all these characters that people have grown to love over the last two movies and kill them off or turn them evil." I mean, we all knew it had to happen to match up with the original films, but that didn't make it any easier to watch. I totally understand why Lucas said it wasn't a movie for kids. I'm giving in JJJJ out of JJJJJ. The film could've gotten the last J if it hadn't had quite as many CGI scenes with no actual people in them.

    jlm, 5.19.05, 12:41pm
    |
    Date: May 18, 2005
    Time: 7:47pm
    Subject: Stupid Quiz of the Day
    *****

    Your Deadly Sins

    Envy: 80%
    Gluttony: 40%
    Sloth: 40%
    Lust: 20%
    Pride: 20%
    Greed: 0%
    Wrath: 0%
    Chance You'll Go to Hell: 29%
    You will die a boring death. While dying, you will be jealous of those who die dramatic deaths.
     I guess I should be grateful - Patrick of Patrick's Place is going to die with his hand down his underwear, watching Star Trek!

    And I'm willing to bet that at least one person will read this and go "only a 29% chance?" What can I say? I lead a charmed life! As for that 0% in wrath, I guess that's because there were no questions centering on stupid people!

    We're meeting Jaclyn in an hour-ish to get dinner before the movie. I'm a little concerned though - apparently Anakin killed a whole bunch of sand people in the last movie. I don't remember that part. Perhaps I should've watched Episodes I & II before tonight. Oh well...too late now. :o)

    jlm, 5.18.05, 7:53pm
    |
    Date: May 18, 2005
    Time: 12:05am
    Subject: Hype - Episode III
    *****
    This time tomorrow I'll be standing in line with a bunch of pimple-faced teenagers with capes and light sabres, fighting for non-sucking seats for the "movie event of the summer." That's right - Jaclyn convinced me and Scott that we wanted to see Star Wars on opening night. I do love the opening night freak-show. And there's something great about seeing a movie surrounded by people for whom this is the pinnacle of greatness. That being said, we couldn't get tickets for the midnight show (all 9 theaters are sold out) but we get to go at 12:30. Either way, I'll be requiring a nap and lots of caffeine to stay awake. Especially after our day-o-fun today!

    We had such a great time in the Magic Kingdom with Dawn and Mark. We went on lots of rides (yay!); saw Cinderellabration (a disappointment...it had no plot!); had lunch at Tony's, from where we watched the parade; and Dawn and I really got the chance to spend time together for the first time since Laura's wedding week. It was great, and I was sorry to see them go. Luckily, I have pictures to remember the day!


    Interesting notes: The picture of Scott was taken on the Jungle Cruise - who knew those boats went so fast? And kudos to Dawn and Mark for picking the silliest hats for their requisite "Stupid Hat" photo!

    After Dawn and Mark headed back off to sea, Scott and I met up with Jaclyn. She found the shirt I've been searching for -- at Property Control of all places! So I'm going to give her the crazy green sausage arm shirt. We went to MGM and had turkey legs and finally got to see Fantasmic. I really love that show. And then she suckered us into getting those after-midnight tickets to see Star Wars.

    On the agenda for the next 36 hours:
  • Sleep in past 10am
  • Laundry
  • Grocery Shopping
  • Nap
  • Meet at Downtown Disney to fill up our slushie cups, get a late dinner, and get in line for SW so we don't get stuck in the front row!
  • Pass out around 4am and get up for work on Thursday

    jlm, 5.18.05, 12:20am
    |
    Date: May 17, 2005
    Time: 12:41am
    Subject: Chopsticks and More!
    *****
    Today I had lunch at the Tomorrowland Noodle Station. Below are the actual introduction and instructions from the wrapper of the chopsticks:

    Welcome to Chinese Restaurant.
    Please try your Nice Chinese Food With Chopsticks the traditional and typical of Chinese glonous history and cultual.
  • Tuk under tnurnb and held firmly
  • Add second chcostick hold it as you hold a pencil
  • Hold tirst chopstick in originai position move the second one up and down Not you can pick up anything:

    So my theory is that this company scanned the text from another source, and the computer messed up the characters. The words thumb and tnurnb look alike...if you squint! Anyway, I just thought it was much too amusing to keep to myself.

    Anyway, today was long, hot, and ultimately fun. I met up with Jaclyn at Epcot to go take pictures around the World Showcase. I got some nice ones of the Pooh and Lion King characters, but am not going to waste the bandwidth posting them. She has a new digital camera she was just itching to try out. So we walked 2 miles around Epcot, and then hopped on the monorail for lunch and castle pictures. At this point, her asthma starts giving her trouble, and her already queasy stomach (she thinks I'm going to be pregnant and she's going to have morning sickness. what a friend!) gets worse. After the castle, we went to "noodle heaven" for lunch, and then rode the TTA. Well it was about 9 million degrees in the shade today, and I was way too sweaty to go to work in what I was wearing, so I bought a new shirt:
    Then we hopped back on the monorail to get our cars from the Epcot lot. Jaclyn was really really not feeling well, so she ended up calling in. I went, talked to some nice people, some not-so-nice people, and spent a lot of time sitting at my desk with my eyes closed pretending I was at home in bed.

    And now...sleep. Tomorrow: quickie visit from Dawn and Mark. Hopefully the weather will hold out. The past two days have had rain in the forecast and so far we've been lucky. I don't know what I'm going to wear - maybe I'll throw in a load of clothes before bed so that I'll have some options in the morning.

    jlm, 5.17.05, 12:57am
    |
    Date: May 15, 2005
    Time: 1:33pm
    Subject: Transcript
    *****
    Below is an as-close-as-I-can-get-it transcript of a conversation between me and my manager last night. The back-story: yesterday was my 5-year company anniversary, and I was supposed to receive a pin. I had asked her earlier in the night who had my pin and was answered with a blank stare and the question: "when is your anniversary?" so right before I left, she stopped me and the following interchange took place:
    Her: I found out why I don't have your pin. For the five-year anniversary we do a big celebration with the ambassadors and we present you with your pin.
    Me: OK...so when am I getting my pin?
    Her: Well when are your days off?
    Me: Tuesday & Wednesday
    Her: Well, I doubt it would be before Monday, since Joel (the secretary for our area) is out until Monday. And I'm off Wednesday & Thursday. We'll try to shoot for Friday. When do you come in?
    Me: 1:00 for TOPS, but I don't know if we're going to have a longer practice because it's our last one before the competition.
    Her: OK, then we'll shoot for 4:00 on Friday if we can get everyone together.

    Don't get me wrong - I love attention. And the ambassador thing is a nice touch. But they have known for five years that yesterday was going to be my anniversary. Why, for the love of Pete, has none of this been planned until right now???

    That being said, I have a feeling that there may actually be something planned for tomorrow when the big manager will actually be in the building that my manager isn't aware of. If not, I'm going to hunt down Joel and beg for my pin. I WANT MY PIN!!!

    jlm, 5.15.05, 1:41pm
     |
    Date: May 15, 2005
    Time: 3:04am
    Subject: Saturday Six
    *****
    I've had an eventful night - impromptu ice cream party @ Ghirardelli, being called incompetant at work, and let's not forget my missing five-year pin...which I might get next Friday. Perhaps I'll talk about those things in the morning. For now, let's have fluff, in the form of the Saturday Six...

    1. How many scars do you have on your body? Where are they? Two (not including some random chicken pock scars) - the $5,000 Harry Potter scar from the bus accident and the one on my ankle that I gave myself shaving for the senior prom.

    2. What is the last junk food you ate in such large quantity that you actually felt guilty afterwards? Umm...probably the bag-o-tortilla chips and whole container of guacamole. Although I wouldn't say I felt guilty...more like really ill!

    3. What is the closest spot to your home where you go when you feel like you need an afternoon escape? The AMC 24. Nothing like a good cry movie when you're feeling blue!

    4. Of those in your collection, what movie have you watched the most times? After careful consideration and consultation with Scott, I have chosen Sweet Home Alabama and Save the Last Dance. I've seen Princess Bride the most times, but haven't actually watched the DVD yet!

    5. Have you ever felt discriminated against? What about you do you believe led to the discrimination? sure...but only for my lack of education.

    6. RAPID FIRE QUESTION #3: Have you ever hired a:
    a. Maid     in my dreams!
    b. Lawyer     no
    c. Chauffer     no, but I rode in a limo to my prom
    d. Plumber     no...but maintenance will be here on monday to check our leaky toilet
    e. Photographer     does Herb count? we'll say yes
    f. Realtor     nope
    g. Gardener     no...but Mom once hired Mark the carpet guy to plant some mums. he was so weird!
    h. Personal Trainer     wait until I stop laughing....no!
    i. Psychic/Spirtual Advisor     my crystal ball says no
    j. Mortician     no

    jlm, 5.15.05, 3:25am
    |
    Date: May 13, 2005
    Time: 10:49pm
    Subject: Oh, unlucky day!
    *****

    This is my new antenna topper. say it with me: "ooh...shiny!"

    I really do try to be drama-free. Try is the key word there...no snickering please. I try to not complain about stupid things, or stupid people (except when it's really funny). I really try hard to not gossip or stab people in the back. And right now I'm so incredibly frustrated with people on the TOPS team who don't try as hard as I do - not to memorize stupid facts, but to show a little grace and compassion to the other people on the team.

    There's one person on the team that certain other team members would prefer to boot. She has a habit of calling in or skipping practices, and because of her (at the request of said other teammates) there was a practice attendance requirement put on us. Today was her 3rd missed practice, which *should* mean that she would be off the team...but since we already took the assessment I think she's no longer replaceable.

    Actually, of the 7 people that should've been there, only 3 of us showed up. Two had family emergencies, one is on vacation, and one called in today. And of the 3 of us who showed up, we should've not even bothered. Most of our practice time was completely unproductive, since one person who was there kept complaining about how inconsiderate the person who called in was.

    So I mostly sat there quietly while she harped and read my notes and occasionally interrupted her rantings with questions about park maps or hotel offerings. And when I got home I e-mailed Beth, who is our manager/coach to warn her that when she gets back on Tuesday she should expect to step square into this hornet nest. I don't give two hoots which four people sit together up on the stage. All I care is that whomever they are, they act like grown-ups and treat eachother with a little respect...and that they know all the correct answers.

    And there's a big nasty roach-monster in my laundry room. It ran across the dryer when I was loading clothes into the washer. So now Scott is going to have to finish that load of laundry when he gets home from work. I'm certainly not going back in there any time soon! I went back in just long enough to spray a line of HotShot roach killer in front of the washer & dryer so that if the evil beast (probably British, right mom?) crossed the line it would seriously regret it!

    And so ends Friday the 13th. Silly drama abounds in my life, no matter how I try to avoid it.

    jlm, 5.13.05, 11:03pm
     |
    Date: May 12, 2005
    Time: 12:26am
    Subject: Day-o-Fun
    *****
    Today I had a day-o-fun with my bestest (and oh! the competition) girlfriend. We started at Goofy's for slushie refills, then went driving around looking at houses neither of us will ever live in. Then we went to Ft. Wilderness to have lunch at Trail's End (mmm...fried chicken...), and made friends at the Tri Circle D petting farm...


    Truth be told the petting farm was kinda lame. Goats & pigs. And a mini horse. Click on the horse and look for the hidden mickey!

    After Jaclyn and I had our fill of petting the animals(and had thoroughly washed our hands), we headed to Epcot to check out the topiaries Flower & Garden, as well as the new Butterfly Garden...


    Monarch caterpillars munching on some milkweed, and some other butterflies chillin' on the flowers...they're so pretty!

    We also rode Mission: SPACE, which had absolutely no wait. How great for us! And then when we finished, I sent Scott a Postcard from Space (viewable for 90 days). We rode Spaceship Earth, and the boat rides in Mexico and Norway. Then it started to rain, so we walked to Beach Club and had ice cream at Beaches & Cream. Then we walked back to Epcot, rode Soarin' and headed out of the park.

    After a stop at WOD (where I bought a new t-shirt and a glass for just $18) and a quick run to the Contemporary (in search of the elusive green t-shirt), it was time for the day-o-fun to come to an end.

    Not surprisingly, my body aches from the loop we did around Epcot...especially the second half where we were soaked and carrying around all that extra water weight. I took lots more pictures than what I put on here...but no one wants to see 5 pictures of an uncooperative peacock or every single topiary in Epcot. I think now it's time for bed!

    jlm, 5.12.05, 12:45am
    |
    Date: May 10, 2005
    Time: 9:50pm
    Subject: Mommy-razzi
    *****
    It's probably best I don't have kids. It's also probably best I have upgraded to a digital camera. After all, every time I see something cute, I have to get a picture! Below are some pictures of my cats trying to sleep -- Kilo hanging out inside the fuzzy tunnel (the one designed for cats to play in!), and Milo, whose expressions say "no pictures!" and "don't hate me because I'm beautiful."

    And Scott, it's not a bad haircut...really! Sometimes a little change isn't as bad as you think. And you know I wouldn't lie to the blog. :o)

    jlm, 5.10.05, 10:06pm
    |
    Date: May 10, 2005
    Time: 1:51pm
    Subject: Oh baby!
    *****
    So I found this quiz and was really worried when I was taking it that I was going to find out that I was actually conservative, pretending to be liberal. Thank goodness I was wrong!!

    Your Political Profile

    Overall: 25% Conservative, 75% Liberal
    Social Issues: 25% Conservative, 75% Liberal
    Personal Responsibility: 50% Conservative, 50% Liberal
    Fiscal Issues: 25% Conservative, 75% Liberal
    Ethics: 25% Conservative, 75% Liberal
    Defense and Crime: 0% Conservative, 100% Liberal

    Please Janette...please take the quiz...it'll be fun to compare our results! ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha

    jlm, 5.10.05, 1:53pm
    |
    Date: May 10, 2005
    Time: 10:40am
    Subject: And then...they weekended.
    *****
    So the TOPS assessment wasn't as bad as I thought it was going to be. In fact, I've seen last year's assessment -- ours was ridiculously easier. Of course, of the 40 questions, I know I got 6 wrong. So of my 120 possible points, I probably got 99 or 102. I'll take those odds. I'm not going to post any of the questions, since this is a public site and there are other teams out there who haven't yet taken it.

    I celebrated the end of phase 1 by not studying at all last night at work. I watched Tarzan on the TV and read news articles. And then I came home and typed the 38 questions we remembered so that Beth could keep a copy for next year's team. But they are saved on my computer at home, where they will remain until all of the other teams have taken the quiz. Paranoia...it's a beautiful thing! :o)

    Scott and I have the day off together today, and he has an OT shift tomorrow so I'm going out to play with Jaclyn. I don't know what we're doing, but we're meeting at Goofy's for slushies before we start. And today...Scott has to get a haircut. I don't know what else is on the agenda. And I don't care...because I know that the agenda doesn't include going to work.

    jlm, 5.10.05, 10:59am
    |
    Date: May 9, 2005
    Time: 9:21am
    Subject: TOPS, part 1
    *****
    TOPS assessment this afternoon: 40 questions, 3 points each, 120 points per person, for a total of 480 possible points for our team. This written assessment counts for just under half of our total score, and determines our rank going into the live competition rounds.

    I'm going to sit at Perkins with Thetis for a few hours and study what we can...there's so much I still don't know. Tickets though... 208,205,202,199,196,193,185,154?,119,59.75...those are the ticket prices for adults, from 10-day down to 1-day. Park hopping for $35/ticket, MPP for $45/ticket. And Blinkers is the arcade at Vero. And Murggie's Den is at Hilton Head.

    I'm going to poop a lot today...I can tell already.

    jlm, 5.9.05, 9:26am
     |
    Date: May 8, 2005
    Time: 11:04am
    Subject: Quickie Movie Reviews
    *****
  • Bourne Supremacy: Replaced dialogue with car chases and other assorted fights. Literally, the only things the movie shared with the book by the same name were the characters. This story was better. I didn't like the book at all. I could've gone my whole life without seeing this movie and not regretted it. JJJ out of JJJJJ
  • The General's Daughter: I watched it a half-dozen times in college when I programmed it on PS View. I love the story, I love John Travolta, and I think the movie overall deserves JJJJj out of JJJJJ.
  • Anchorman: The Legend of Ron Burgundy: Stupid stupid stupid! But you have to expect that from the trailers/commercials...and from the fact that it's a Will Ferrell movie. Cameos from Vince Vaughn, Tim Robbins, Ben Stiller, and Owen Wilson as the anchormen from rival stations were the highlight of the movie. I'm glad I saw it, but I don't think I'll watch it again until it's on TBS on a Sunday afternoon and there's nothing else on. JJJj out of JJJJJ

    jlm, 5.8.05, 11:12am
     |
    Date: May 6, 2005
    Time: 12:34am
    Subject: Exhaustion!
    *****
    We had such a great day with Beth & co. yesterday I can't even believe it. Kaitlyn & Marissa usually aren't big on strangers (which I consider myself because I only see them once a year) but they both talked to me and Scott throughout the day. We did 3 parks, and hit all the major rides at each with practically no wait. I think my favorite part of the day was when Scott and I took the girls on the teacups and spun really really fast and we got off the ride and Kaitlyn went up to Pete and said that we went spinnier than Pete does. Finally I get cool cousin points - these nuts were hard to crack!

    And then today we were back to work. I should've taken vacation this week. The company unrolled an airport-to-hotel luggage & transportation service today that was so completely inadequate our heads were spinning. Four, five, six, eight hours after people checked in they still hadn't gotten their bags. And we were comping stuff left and right - diapers and baby food (because some people just don't have the sense to pack these things in their carry-ons), bathing suits, pajamas, etc. - not to mention the cases of toiletries that we handed out.

    OK, it's the first day of a free service, and lots of people were understanding...for the first few hours. But the company screwed up. They were apparently understaffed at the airport, the luggage tags weren't delivered before these people left home, and they didn't have enough buses or trucks to move people and belongings. I can't remember the last time I felt this lack of pride to work where I do.

    It'll get better. Hopefully. At least I get 2 hours off the phone tomorrow for TOPS practice.

    jlm, 5.6.05, 12:48am
     |
    Date: May 3, 2005
    Time: 9:19pm
    Subject: A "Nothing" Day
    *****
    Scott and I spent the day at home. We didn't answer our phones. We didn't go out. We did laundry, baked cookies, ate nachos, watched TV, and just generally enjoyed each other's company. It was nice. I tried to take a nap, but ended up watching some guy on Oprah named Dr. Oz talk about poop - the correct sound poop should make when it hits the water is a sploosh, not a plop. And your poop should make an S-shape in the bowl. Logs and marbles are bad. He actually had Oprah don a pair of purple rubber gloves and touch dead peoples' organs - colon, intestine, kidney - it was weird. Then something on VH1 caught our eye and we never quite made it back to Dr. Poop.

    I got to watch Idol tonight - a welcome hour of songs I didn't know sung by people I won't remember. I'm still hoping Carrie wins. I realized tonight that Bo makes every song sound the same. But I'm not even bothering to vote until the final. See, there's this horrid     webpage started by someone who obviously hates Idol that encourages people to vote for the worst performer on the show. If you hate a show that much, why not just turn on one of the other 999 channels on your TV and watch something else? Why do you want to ruin it? I just think it's a sad sad example of the possibility of the internet.

    And now, more about me...based on my birthday:
    Your Birthdate: March 3
    Being born on the 3rd day of the month is likely to add a good bit of vitality to your life. The energy of 3 allows you bounce back rapidly from setbacks, physical or mental. There is a restlessness in your nature, but you seem to be able to portray an easygoing, "couldn't care less" attitude.

    You have a natural ability to express yourself in public, and you always make a very good impression. Good with words, you excel in writing, speaking, and possibly singing. You are energetic and always a good conversationalist.

    You have a keen imagination, but you tend to scatter your energies and become involved with too may superficial matters.

    You are affectionate and loving, but sometimes too sensitive.

    You are subject to rapid ups and downs.


    jlm, 5.3.05, 9:28pm
    |
    Date: May 3, 2005
    Time: 12:41pm
    Subject: Doing "Something" with your life
    *****
    People I went to high school with are doing great things. Scott Pugh is a Navy doctor. There's a handful of teachers, nurses, lawyers, research scientists... And then there are the people like me - waiters, mailmen, hairdressers. And then there are the unbelieveable. Brian Herzlinger made a movie about his quest to get a date with Drew Barrymore, and this movie has won all sorts of awards at film festivals. He has been on Leno! He And now it's gotten a distribution deal, so it may actually play in a theater near you!



    jlm, 5.3.05, 12:48pm
    |
    Date: May 2, 2005
    Time: 11:57pm
    Subject: ABCs
    *****
    I found this amusing little survey on someone else's AOL journal and thought it looked like fun.

    A is for Age: 26
    B is for Boyfriend: Haven't had once since March of '03 when I upgraded to a fiance
    C is for Career: none...but I have an amusing job as a telephone operator/answerer of stupid questions
    D is for Dad's name: Joe Bob Jr. (ok...if he were from TN that would be his name)
    E is for Essential item to bring to a party: spinach dip...I guess that's why I don't get invited to too many parties!
    F is for Favorite song at the moment: Wishing You Were Somehow Here Again from Phantom (out on DVD tomorrow!)
    G is for Girlfriend: hmm...female friends...just Jaclyn I guess. I don't like too many girls
    H is for Hometown: Marlton, NJ
    I is for instruments you play: trumpet & piano (poorly) and voice
    J is for Jam or Jelly you like: grape or strawberry jam
    K is for Kids: Z for zero
    L is for Living arrangements: 3rd floor one-bedroom apartment with 2 cats, a husband, and some anemic plants
    M is for Month you were born: March
    N is for Name of your best friend(s): Scott - who else would put up with all my s**t?!?
    O is for Overnight hospital stays: (knocking wood) none since birth. I slept in the Pocono Medical Center after the bus accident, in the waiting room, if that counts.
    P is for Phobia[s]: heights, roaches, driving on I-4
    Q is for Quote you like:
    Life is not measured by the breaths we take,
    but by the moments that take our breath away.
    R is for Relationship that lasted the longest: the one I have with my mom. if you're looking for non-family relationships, I think Scott now holds that title...by a little bit
    S is for Sexual position: I'm pro-sex
    T is for Time you wake up: 11am...it's a benefit of not having children
    U is for Unique trait: nearly albino
    V is for Vegetable you love: peas! corn! brussel sprouts!
    W is for Worst habit: being critical of loved ones
    X is for X-rays you've had: well, if we're not counting dental, the only ones in my adult life were after the bus accident - my knee at the ER and my arm back at PSU a few days later.
    Y is for Yummy food you make: baked mac n cheese...and spinach dip...and muffins (ok...not from scratch...but I do love muffins so!)
    Z is for Zodiac sign: Pisces

    Well, that's it for tonight. Tomorrow Scott and I are having a Scott & Jamie Only day...followed by a day with the Esposito's on Wednesday.

    jlm, 5.3.05, 12:21am
     |
    Date: May 2, 2005
    Time: 11:51am
    Subject: British Cockroaches
    *****
    There's a saying here in central Florida - Where a Wal Mart is built, British tourists will follow. OK, it's not a saying, more like a rule of thumb. But really - isn't there anywhere I can live or shop and not be surrounded by them?

    Jaclyn is looking for a house, and kept hounding me for the name of the cute little housing complex on 27 right at 192. It's strange that one could drive past such a place every day and not know what it's called or who the builder is or anything. So I found the name, and did a little internet search. It turns out the reason we locals didn't know about it is because they're not marketed toward us - it's an entire complex of vacation villas catering to Brits.

    I feel so dirty. Route 27...the last frontier of vacationers...has now been tamed. It's no wonder the people who actually live here can't afford to - gajillionaires and foreigners (and by 'foreigners' I mean people who actually live in another country - I mean no harm to anyone who actually immigrated) are snapping up our land and encouraging other people to come and stay in houses and inflate the economy.

    Why can't they just stay in hotels? On 192? Or out by Universal on I-Drive?

    jlm, 5.2.05, 12:00pm
    |
    Date: May 1, 2005
    Time: 12:29am
    Subject: "Lusty Month of May"
    *****
    In Camelot (performed by CHS in spring of '96) I have distinct memories of the blocking for the musical number "Lusty Month of May." I didn't enjoy it - sat there with another girl and a guy (gay?) pretending to be fawning all over him. In my uncomfortable polyester renaissance dress. Random memory popped up there, I decided to go with it.

    It rained tonight - buckets. I was actually glad I was driving because otherwise I'd have had a total panic attack and forced Scott to pull into the gas station until it stopped. But we lived through it. As always.

    Jaclyn traded shifts for tomorrow & monday with someone on days who needed to have the daytime off to deal with some family issues. Bummer for me - who's going to keep me entertained when the idiots become too much to bear? Bummer for her too...I've seen her at 9:30am...she's less of a morning person than Scott!

    We got two big loaves of french bread at walmart tonight. I think I'm going to rip off a hunk, butter it up, eat it, and then go to bed. ahh...home at last!

    jlm, 5.1.05, 12:36am
     |